Calvin and Hobbes Quotes (Comic Strip for Kids to Enjoy) : Current School News

Calvin and Hobbes Quotes (Comic Strip for Kids to Enjoy)

Filed in Quote by on August 26, 2022

Popular children’s comic strip Calvin and Hobbes addressed issues including life, love, and relationships. The Calvin and Hobbes quotes below highlight the comic strip’s keen humor.

Calvin and Hobbes Quotes

Calvin and Hobbes Quotes

You can learn a few life lessons from the Calvin and Hobbes quotes we’ve compiled and use them to better yourself.

1. “We’re so busy watching out for what’s just ahead of us that we don’t take time to enjoy where we are.” – Bill Watterson

2. “As far as I’m concerned, if something is so complicated that you can’t explain it in 10 seconds, then it’s probably not worth knowing anyway.” – Bill Watterson

3. “Sometimes when I’m talking, my words can’t keep up with my thoughts. I wonder why we think faster than we speak. Probably so we can think twice.” – Bill Watterson

4. “The world bores you when you’re cool.” – Bill Watterson

5. “There’s never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”  – Bill Watterson

6. “To make a bad day worse, spend it wishing for the impossible.” – Bill Watterson

7. “It’s true, Hobbes, ignorance is bliss! Once you know things, you start seeing problems everywhere … and once you see problems, you feel like you ought to fix them … and fixing problems always seems to require personal change … and change means doing things that aren’t fun! I say phooey to that!” – Bill Watterson

8. “The problem about the future is that it keeps turning into the present.” – Bill Watterson

9. “The best presents don’t come in boxes.” – Bill Watterson

10. “I say, if your knees aren’t green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine your life.” – Bill Watterson

11. “At school, new ideas are thrust at you every day. Out in the world, you’ll have to find your inner motivation to seek for new ideas on your own.” – Bill Watterson

12. “Mothers are the necessity of invention.” – Bill Watterson

13. “It’s going to be a grim day when the world is run by a generation that doesn’t know anything but what it’s seen on TV.”  – Bill Watterson

14. “It’s surprising how hard we’ll work when the work is done just for ourselves.” – Bill Watterson

15. “Your preparation for the real world is not in the answers you’ve learned, but in the questions you’ve learned how to ask yourself.” – Bill Watterson

16. “Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.” – Bill Watterson

17. “Every time I’ve built character, I’ve regretted it.” – Bill Watterson

18. “Never argue with a six-year-old who shaves.” – Bill Watterson

19. “I understand my tests are popular reading in the teachers’ lounge.” – Bill Watterson

20. “Where do we keep all our chainsaws, Mom?” – Bill Watterson

21. “I wonder what people knew before there were magazine quizzes.” – Bill Watterson

22. “I won’t eat any cereal that doesn’t turn the milk purple.” – Bill Watterson

23. “It’s hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning.” – Bill Watterson

24. “Becoming an adult is probably the dumbest thing you can ever do!” – Bill Watterson

25. “Who was the guy who first looked at a cow and said ‘I think I’ll drink whatever comes out of these when I squeeze ’em?” – Bill Watterson

26. “There’s no problem so awful that you can’t add some guilt to it and make it even worse.” – Calvin

27. “Dad, how do soldiers killing each other solve the world’s problems?” – Calvin

28. “Life’s a lot more fun when you aren’t responsible for your actions.” – Calvin

29. “Everybody seeks happiness! Not me, though! That’s the difference between me and the rest of the world. Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!” – Calvin

30. “Life is like topography, Hobbes. There are summits of happiness and success, flat stretches of boring routine, and valleys of frustration and failure.” – Calvin

31. “As you can see, I have memorized this utterly useless piece of information long enough to pass a test question. I now intend to forget it forever. You’ve taught me nothing except how to cynically manipulate the system. Congratulations.” – Calvin

32. “I think nighttime is dark so you can imagine your fears with less distraction.” – Calvin

33. “I suppose if we couldn’t laugh at things that don’t make sense, we couldn’t react to a lot of life.” – Hobbes

34. “Until you stalk and overrun, you cannot devour anyone.” – Hobbes

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35. “We’re so busy watching out for what’s just ahead of us that we don’t take time to enjoy where we are.” – Calvin

36. “You know, Hobbes, some days, even my lucky rocketship underpants don’t help.” – Calvin

37. “They say the satisfaction of teaching makes up for the lousy pay.” – Calvin

38. “Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery.” – Calvin

39. “The world bores you when you’re cool.” – Calvin

Calvin and Hobbes Quotes

40. “Yeah, but actually, I’ve got the same questions about God.” – Calvin

41. “So the secret to good self-esteem is to lower your expectations to the point where they’re already met?” – Hobbes

42. “What on earth am I doing here on this beautiful day?! This is the only life I’ve got!” – Calvin

43. “Van Gogh would’ve sold more than one painting if he’d put tigers in them.” – Hobbes

44. “Sure, I’m hungry too.” – Hobbes

Famous Calvin and Hobbes Quotes

45. “I see. And what will you do if the rest of your life doesn’t entertain you every minute?” – Miss Wormwood

46. “It says here that ‘religion is the opiate of the masses.’ What do you suppose that means?” – Calvin

47. “A little rudeness and disrespect can elevate a meaningless interaction to a battle of wills and add drama to an otherwise dull day.” – Calvin

48. “Life is full of surprises, but never when you need one.” – Calvin

49. “That’s thoughtful of you.” – Hobbes

50. “They say the world is a stage. But obviously, the play is unrehearsed and everybody is ad-libbing his lines.” – Calvin

51. “In that case, young man, I suggest you start working harder. What you get out of school, depends on what you put into it.” – Miss Wormwood

52. “Right. You’ve got to take the bad with the good.” – Calvin’s Dad

53. “Sometimes, I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.” – Calvin

54. “Next time, try a drink of water and a few deep breaths.” – Miss Wormwood

55. “I’m killing time while I wait for life to shower me with meaning and happiness.” – Calvin

56. “If your emotional security depends on satisfying a need you didn’t have before you read the ad, go ahead.” – Hobbes

57. “You know, Hobbes, I can’t figure out this death stuff. Why did that little raccoon have to die? He didn’t do anything wrong. He was just little! What’s the point of putting him here and taking him back so soon?” – Calvin

58. Hobbes: “A lot of things are like that.” Calvin: “Nobody asks me how things ought to be. I’ve got tons of ideas!”

59. “If good things lasted forever, would we appreciate how precious they are?” – Hobbes

60. “You’re lucky that girls don’t have to put up with this nonsense. If a girl doesn’t want to play sports, that’s fine! But if a guy doesn’t spend his afternoons chasing some stupid ball, he’s called a wimp! You girls have it easy!” – Calvin

61. “I suppose if people thought about real issues and needs instead of manufactured desires, the economy would collapse and we’d have total anarchy.” – Calvin’s Mom

Best Calvin and Hobbes Quotes

62. “As far as I’m concerned, if something is so complicated that you can’t explain it in 10 seconds, then it’s probably not worth knowing anyway.” – Calvin

63. “Weekends don’t count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless.” – Calvin

64. “Becoming an adult is probably the dumbest thing you can ever do!” – Calvin

65. “It’s not denial. I’m just selective about the reality I accept.” – Calvin

66. “I don’t think I’d have been in such a hurry to reach adulthood if I’d known the whole thing was going to be ad-libbed.” – Calvin

67. “Well, remember what you said, because, in a day or two, I’ll have a witty and blistering retort! You’ll be devastated then.” – Calvin

68. “You can’t just turn on creativity like a faucet. You have to be in the right mood.” – Calvin

69. “I think we dream so we don’t have to be apart so long. If we’re in each other’s dreams, we can play together all night.” – Calvin

70. “It’s only work if somebody makes you do it.” – Calvin

71. “To make a bad day worse, spend it wishing for the impossible.” – Calvin

 Hobbes Quotes

72. “Why waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous?” – Hobbes

73. Calvin: “You know, sometimes, the world seems like a pretty mean place.” Hobbes: “That’s why animals are so soft and huggy.”

74. “People always bend the rules if they think they can get away with it.” – Calvin

75. “You know how people are. They only recognize greatness when some authority confirms it.” – Calvin

76. “I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep everyone’s expectations.” – Calvin

77. “Once it’s too late, you appreciate what a miracle life is.” – Calvin

78. “A day can really slip by when you’re deliberately avoiding what you’re supposed to do.” – Calvin

Calvin and Hobbes Quotes on Reality

79. “Would you welcome in a dog that wasn’t house-trained?” – Hobbes

80. “I like maxims that don’t encourage behavior modification.” – Calvin

81. “Dad, are you vicariously living through me in the hope that my accomplishments will validate your mediocre life and in some way compensate for all of the opportunities you botched?” – Calvin

82. “Maybe that’s why it’s hard to tell if we’re living in a tragedy or a farce.” – Hobbes

83. “I say, if your knees aren’t green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine your life.” – Calvin

84. “Why do I get the feeling society is trying to make us feel discontented with everything we do and insecure about who we are?” – Calvin’s Dad

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85. Calvin: “I don’t want to learn this! It’s completely irrelevant to my life!” Calvin’s Dad: “This isn’t irrelevant. Everyone needs to know this.” Calvin: “I don’t! I can get along fine without math!”

86. “You know, school wouldn’t be so bad if you didn’t have to go every day and if you didn’t have to learn anything―and if you took away all the teachers and all the other kids. If it was completely different, school would be great.” – Calvin

87. “It must be awful to be a girl. I’m sure it’s frustrating knowing that men are bigger, stronger, and better at abstract thought than women. Really, if you’re a girl, what would make you go on living?” – Calvin

88. “Yep. It’s our patriotic duty to buy distractions from a simple life.” – Cavin’s Mom

89. “Popular culture isn’t to blame for selling twisted values. Movies, records, and TV shows reflect the reality of our times. Artists depict hatred and violence because that’s what they see.” – Calvin

90. “We need more special effects and dance numbers.” – Calvin

91. “Miss Wormwood, I’m not going to learn this material unless you make it enthralling.” – Calvin

92. “So pitching this junk would make me some kind of terrorist, huh?” – Calvin’s Dad

93. “I suppose if I had two X chromosomes, I’d feel hostile too.” – Calvin

94. “I just figured that teachers slept inside coffins over the summer.” – Calvin

95. “People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don’t realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world.” – Calvin

96. “I’ll bet future civilizations find out more about us than we’d like them to know.” – Calvin

97. “The problem about the future is that it keeps turning into the present.” – Calvin

98. “Never argue with a six-year-old who shaves.” – Calvin

This comic strip captured the thoughts of a six-year-old. Your mind will be made up on the value of life and everything you come into contact with as a result of their funny lines.

Thanks for checking out these amazing Calvin and Hobbes quotes! Don’t forget to take a look at our similar collection of quotes as you share to others to get inspire.

CSN Team.

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